How to Motivate an Over-Scheduled Child: Tips and Tricks to Unlock their Full Potential

Do you worry that your child is overscheduled? It is true that after-school activities like music lessons, sports, and art provide enrichment and can enhance children's lives. The problem is that too many activities can have negative consequences, so much so that they may counteract the benefits of extracurricular activities.

It can be tough for parents to identify whether a child has too much on their plate, but knowing the signs can help. In this article, we'll discuss signs of an overscheduled child and tips parents can use to establish balance for their kids. 

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Is My Child Over-Scheduled?

There's nothing wrong with multiple structured activities as long as the child has adequate unstructured time, too. The tricky part is that there's no "perfect" number of scheduled activities parents can count on across the board. While some children may thrive with multiple extracurricular activities and school-related responsibilities, other children with the same commitments may need to cut down.

Let's say that you have three kids. Each may have a very different threshold for structured activities. One might need to take on a singular extracurricular activity only; others may thrive with three. Consider your child's temperament. Shy or more introverted kids might need more time to unwind or self-direct. This is just one example of a child who requires fewer commitments. Some kids' thresholds will transform with age. Teens and kids entering middle school often have changing interests and may be able to participate in more activities or fewer activities as they age.

With this in mind, the quantity of supervised activities is just one factor to consider when determining whether your child's overscheduled. There are other signs adults shouldn't miss. 

Signs

Being overscheduled will affect every child differently, but there are signs parents can look out for. Here are some common signs parents may notice in their overscheduled children:

• No free time or little time for friends and family members. The first and potentially most noticeable sign that your child is overscheduled is that their organized activities (piano lessons, sports, daily practices, etc.) leave little-to-no room for family time, play dates or time with friends, and free time.
• Complaints about activities. If your child complains about or dreads certain extracurricular activities, expressing that they "don't want to go," it's time to re-evaluate their schedule.
• Mental health effects. Stress from too many activities may impact your child's psychological or emotional well-being. Becoming more irritable, zoning out, eating too much or too little, feelings of anxiety, loss of interest in activities, and being down or drained are all signs kids may be overwhelmed.
• Physical health complaints. If you've noticed an uptick in physical health complaints, like headaches, stomach aches, tiredness, sluggishness, or a general "I don't feel well," it is a possible sign that a child's overscheduled or facing too much stress. 
• Changes in academic progress. Overscheduled kids may notice their grades start slipping, finding it too challenging to keep up with everything on their plates.

Although some of these signs and symptoms can be attributed to other things, they are something to take note of. Once you know that a child's overscheduled, it's time to address it. 

Helping Your Child Balance Their Schedule

Helping your child balance their schedule is critical for their health and development. Use these tips and strategies to support an over-scheduled child in finding balance and success. A child may take time to find the right mix of activities, but it's possible. First, let's talk about how Joon can help.

Try Joon To Help

Joon is a to-do app and game built for children 6-12+. Using Joon is an excellent way to help your child organize their schedule, focus, and stay on top of necessary tasks. Here's how it works:

Parents download the Joon Parent App first and make a task list for their kids. You can add any routines and activities you like, whether homework, eating breakfast before school, household chores, or something else. Children use a separate app called Joon Pet Game. When kids complete tasks that adults assign, they get rewards in Joon Pet Game that let them care for a virtual pet. 

Joon is rated an average of 4.7 out of 5 stars, with more than 4k reviews. Many families even say that Joon has improved their parent-child relationship.

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Set aside unstructured downtime

Kids need downtime, but routine also matters. It's just as necessary for childhood development as enrichment activities are. The key is to find the right balance for your unique child. When you make your child's routine, whether during the school year or Summer, ensure you set aside blocks of time during the day or week where children have no set plans or activities.

Prioritize

Talk about your child's interests - which activities are they interested in keeping? Are there any extracurricular activities they want to quit? Listen to their input and opinion.

As long as it's reasonable, your child's thoughts are the best guide for understanding their needs. For example, if they want to keep their busy schedules, will they have time to eat, sleep, do homework, and unwind? Or, if they don't want to keep every structured activity, do they still want to keep one or two or replace the activities they're involved in right now with something else? Why or why not?

Many parents find that a maximum of three activities (one sport, one creative activity, and one social activity) is a good rule of thumb. Still, it's important again to consider just how different each child is.

Think about non-negotiable activities. For example, homework is necessary during the school year. Then, there will be the things that give kids enjoyment and feelings of fulfillment, like the talent show or a sport they love. Both of these could be at the top of their priority list, but things that don't bring much to their life (e.g., a club they used to like but no longer do) likely aren't.

Teach them to speak up

Many kids will only speak up and say there's too much on their plate if parents teach them how to. Even if you have an outspoken child, it's essential to tell them they can come to you and how to do it. Have a heart-to-heart where you tell your child that you want them to express themselves and hear how they feel, letting them know you can work things out together.

Talk about things like overwhelm, stress, and fear. It's never too late to have this conversation; whether you have younger children or older children, it's a meaningful discussion. Even if it's not relevant now, it could be later. Or, if your child's experiencing mental health concerns that aren't necessarily related to their schedule but you notice signs of overwhelm, anxiety, or stress, this can give them an opening to talk about it.

Talk about self-care

When you check in with your child about their schedule and discuss things like stress and overwhelm, it's a good opportunity to discuss self-care. Are they sleeping well and sleeping enough? Do they go for long periods without eating? Do they know what to do when they feel angry, irritable, or nervous? These are all things to keep tabs on. Older kids and teens especially will start to experience an uptick in emotions. It's critical that children have the skills they need when they do.

Takeaway 

Activities like music lessons and sports can aid child development and be an important part of children's lives. However, things like undirected play, downtime, and family dinners matter, too. Ideally, adults should help kids strike a balance. Prioritizing necessary activities, such as school and extracurricular activities that bring children joy, including free time in a kid's schedule, and using an app like Joon are all ways to help.